Following on from my previous competition tip, in which I gave a few pointers on how to succeed on the first hole, here are my best tips for ruining your scorecard. Before I reveal these unbeatable tips, an explanation is in order. Why should I ruin my scorecard?

Quite simply to respect one of the fundamental principles of golf etiquette. Many of you express that your main concern, your main pleasure in golf, is the camaraderie of the 19th hole and friendship rather than the score.

If, after making a perfect tee shot while your friends are struggling, you continue to play like a god, there is a high risk that they will be offended and not only give you the cold shoulder at the 19th, but in the worst case, refuse to share a drink with you.

It is therefore essential to reassure them by showing them how much worse you can play than they do.

So today

Tip number one: listen to the snake

At the start of the second hole, feeling confident, you take your driver and hit a perfect drive that goes beyond the bunker on the right, which you are lined up with on this left dogleg par 4.

Your friends have had mixed fortunes, one having hit his drive into the woods, the other ending up in the fairway bunker. You let them get themselves out of these tricky situations with a refocusing shot.

For you, the situation is simple: your lie is good, and the green beckons with a flag 120 metres away. You approach your bag and place your hand on your 8-iron, as indicated by your GPS app or your caddie.

But that little voice, unfortunately familiar, whispers something in your right ear.

You know that little voice well; it’s the same sweet, honeyed voice as the snake in Mowgli.

"Come on, Pierre, it’s only 120 metres. Do you really think you need an 8-iron for that? I’m sure that with a nice 9-iron shot, you’ll get your ball on the green. Don’t tell me you can’t hit 120 metres with a 9-iron."

A smile spreads across your face and your ego adds a little more: "Of course I can! The other day I measured it at the driving range, and I saw that with a perfect shot with a 9-iron I could hit 120 metres. Obviously, when the shot isn’t as good, I don’t hit that far, but if I really smack that ball, it’ll be a splendid shot that will impress my mates."

Alerted, your guardian angel arrives at your left ear, but it’s a little too late. You don’t listen to his warning; the 9-iron is already in your hand.

The practice swing feels good, and to be sure you’ll make the distance, you add that big swing of the shoulder that sends your ball into the woods on the left, far from your target.

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Of course, your ball is stuck at the foot of a tree. You’ll have to execute a little left-handed shot to get back onto a small patch of rough.

From there, the very difficult approach you attempt with your pitching wedge will stop short of the green. It must be said that you are quite annoyed; you will need another approach and two putts to finish this par 4 in seven.

See you soon for another tip. And happy golfing!